So much has been happening.
A few months ago, I did a tarot card reading on myself. (As one does.) There was a lot in the layout about dashed dreams and disappointment (no surprise there), but there was also the card about planting seeds of change, followed by the message to be prepared because change would happen quickly.
As with any good prophecy, it has come to pass, but not as I expected/hoped.
Instead of selling millions of e-books on Amazon and retiring to the Bahamas, I’ve had major struggles with health (mental and physical), and came very close to flaming out on my job and going to be a secretary somewhere awful. (Actually, that was slightly outranked by the possibility of becoming a truck driver. If I didn’t have cats….)
Instead of quitting, however, I am going to start working part-time in two weeks. This is a huge relief, because I won’t have to adjust to a new workplace and I’ll still have my health benefits. I’ve never liked being shackled to a job only because of benefits, but there is a lot I love about this job. (And to be completely honest, there were very few jobs on Craigslist or Monster that match my skill set so well.) I’m worried about money, but I’ve lived on a lot less, and I’ll still be making more than I would be making in those secretarial jobs that were my escape plan.
So there’s that…. In the meantime, I finished the 6-week Introduction to Digital Photography course. Some of my photos are at 500px.com. I really loved it! And it makes the fears I talked about a few weeks ago seem so silly. I’ll be starting intermediate next week!
An Interview with Tad Williams, Part 1.
A great start to the interview with Tad. I have a question coming up in the next section or two, I think.
Two weeks of my six-week photography course at the visual arts center are done, and the third is tomorrow. If you go to 500px.com/marianck , you can see this week’s assignment, and last summer’s roving.
I really enjoyed taking the panned motion shot!
It was very cold, but I decided the day before that getting a picture of a lone car going at a fairly even speed would only have it on a Saturday. And there is a place right next to my apartment complex where the cars are slowly coming to a stop light or away from a stop light. So I went there first.
Yes, I sat by the side of the road with my camera. (And a latte!) But I quickly realized I wasn’t close enough to the cars from my vantage point. So I crossed to the other side of the street and sat pretty much on a sidewalk near Cheswick Park, and took a bunch of pictures before I got the one linked to above.
I thought it turned out really well. The instructor said that we needed contrast between the subject and background, & I think I just got really lucky with that. :-)
In 11 days, I start a photography course at the Visual Arts Center of Richmond. And already, the Doubt Demon is talking to me.
Do you have a Doubt Demon? Here are the kinds of things mine says:
- Really? And where do you think you’re going to find time for a new hobby, hmm?
- You can barely squeeze in time for knitting and you barely met your (admittedly self-imposed) deadline for your serial fiction this month.
- Sure, it’s fun to try new things, but remember how it feels when you can’t keep up? I bet everyone else is going to be way better at finding time to take pictures, and you’ll be behind on assignments, and it’s going to feel like middle school.
- This is going to go the way of your singing lessons and musical theater aspirations, you know.
You can tell the Doubt Demon is an old friend of mine.
Fortunately, I’ve been here before (we’re not afraid!) and I know how to talk the Doubt Demon down.
So, here’s my latest letter.
Dear Doubt Demon,
I hear you. It can be scary to try new things, and yeah, sometimes they don’t always work out. Singing made my jaw hurt, it’s true. But hey! I’m singing along with Music of the Night, right this very moment, and isn’t it awesome to be able to hold those notes? And to know the secrets of singing vowels? I think it is.
So what I’m saying, DD, old friend, is learning new things is worth it. This is life, kiddo. We only get one chance at it, as the saying goes. Wasn’t 2014 a little more fun that it would be if I had listened to you every time? Yeah, depression nearly did me in a few times, but that was only one part of last year. There was also going to see Wicked, learning to sing Let it Go better than all the soccer moms, GISHWHES and going to DC and hanging out with your Smarch friends.
So, let’s keep having fun, k? Let’s learn how to take gorgeous pictures, and don’t worry, we’ll leave Perfectionist Pest out of it..