It’s sort of depressing to have a long-term blog that you’re really bad at keeping up. I can look back and see, pretty easily, the things I’ve been really excited about over the years.
There have been a few writing phases. Times when I genuinely thought I would finish a novel, come what may. Last year, I was deep into daily writing, and talking about writing in such earnest ways.
I never finished the novel.
I was so excited about teaching Les Mills classes for a while! For years, that was what kept me moving forward. And in some ways that’s nice to think about, because it ultimately led to me having the best job I’ve ever had.
In other ways, it reminds me I used to love this stuff. I guess that’s the way with any hobby that becomes a job. I mean, it’s a job.
But now, all those instructors who talk about how “passionate” they are about what they do, just make me roll my eyes. When I think about how much energy I put into it back then (and yes, passion), I feel like it was kind of silly.
Hmm. I am probably looking at this the wrong way. A certain amount of obsession was really good for me. Maybe that’s the feeling I really miss. Being in love with the idea of something, with a sense of possibility and potential.
There’s not much I’m in love with right now. Unless you count Lin-Manuel Miranda, ha ha! (*dreamy teenager voice* “He’s so great…!”) I am learning to play the guitar. And I’m doing some interesting things in my work life.
But life just… goes on. It’s hard to feel inspired about much right now.